I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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