so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize