the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
