i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
