I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Randomize