is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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