I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
