i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
He felt like a one man threesome
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
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