she kept yelling 'call me bella'
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
it's like heaven, but drunker
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize
