I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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