No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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