my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
