i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
