her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
You've changed since you got that strap on
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
