PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
