If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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