Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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