it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
