That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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