I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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