its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
This is the high leading the old right now
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
