He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize