im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
