i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
