chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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