they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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