i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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