Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
We had to coat check the pizza.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
