I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
