I need help removing her.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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