glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
