farters have to be the big spoon...
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
