How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
he had hair everywhere except his balls
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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