great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
two words...techno handjob
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Randomize
