I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
