Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
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