the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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