At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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