just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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