A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Found the puke drawer
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
