Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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