i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
And the cops told us we were all naked.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
