so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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