I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize