Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize