when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
