She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
