i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
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