either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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