For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
