he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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